Let Me Know If Something Bad Happens
Author: Jayne4 Oct
Today I got this message from feedburner via my Google Reader:
“Your Source Feed, http://www.bloggerbingo.com/bitterwomen/feed/, is now working fine. Carry on! We will let you know if anything bad happens in the future.”
Wow, like my own little personal CNN.
Alert! Jayne! Hubby thinks you have onion breath!
-or-
Alert! Jayne! Son is eating cookies 30 minutes before dinner!
Because the regular CNN just notifies me of things that can’t possibly affect my life, like:
Alert! Jayne! Britney Spears has done something stupid again!
-or-
Alert! Jayne! Lots of people die hideously! Again today!
It’s always freaking something, but I tell you, I’m sort of liking the idea of this RSS alert telling me any time something bad happens. As long as it’s all about ME, baby.
But then it might be more fun to have something tell me when something good happens. Damn. Even technology has gotten cynical. 3:-O
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Any time something good is supposed to happen sombody comes along and wrecks it all and spoils your happiness and steals your dream and throws it down into the dust where they grind it under their boot-heel while laughing in your face.
I’d stick to bad news if I were you. You know where you are with bad news.
It’s true, they never report any good news. Like when a busload of hobbits drives off a bridge or something.
I kind of like the idea of being informed when everything is just okay. “Attention: nothing is particularly good or bad at this time; maintain status quo.”
Don’t you kind of wish YOU had a news ticker? It could get sent out to others informing them of news THEY need.
ALERT - Look at Jayne like that again and she’ll pour hot coffee on your crotch!
ALERT - Jayne has run out of give a shit! Retreat! Retreat!
I could use that functionality for everything I’m ever responsible for ever.
I know there are ways of keeping up, but just having it take care of itself would be so nice.
Well, I suppose being told what is happening makes you feel like you matter. Bit like getting junk mail.